By Patrick Cahillane – Life, Executive & Business Coach with One Source International Coaching & Training and Founder of the One Source Personal Development Network.
The reason why something is done, created or exists.
“Activity without purpose is the drain on your life” – Tony Robbins
“Decide upon your major definite purpose in life and then organize all your activities around
it” – Brian Tracy
“Define your priorities, know your values and believe in your purpose. Only then can you
effectively share yourself with others” – Les Brown
“A sense of purpose is an incredible alarm clock” – Mel Robbins
They all talk about it. All the great speakers, coaches, consultants, and gurus. The importance of
having a purpose in your life. But where did it all begin?
For me, it started in the mid-1980s when I first picked up a copy of Napoleon Hill’s classic book –
“Think and Grow Rich”.
At the time, I was in my early twenties and was determined to join the ranks of the wealthy, self-made men and women who had already earned their fortunes and attribute their success to this
book.
However, I discovered years later when I became a little more mature and a little bit wiser that this
book is so much more than a how-to manual on acquiring riches. In my opinion, it is a step-by-step
formula on how to get whatever you desire from life.
Do not let the title turn you off. This amazing book can help you to improve your relationships,
health, finances and more once you understand the simple concept that it is a guide. A guide on
how to get whatever you truly desire in life. Personally, I believe a better title would have been
‘Think and Grow Successful.’
I am not going to devote too much of this chapter to promoting or reviewing the principles of this
book, however, I would advise you to seriously consider reading it if you haven’t already done so.
Word of warning however, as it was written in 1937 when the world was a very different place,
some may find it to be a bit dated and a little bit of a hard read.
I will, however, focus on what I believe to be the main principle of the book, which is how to create
what is referred to as your “Definite Major Purpose” statement; how to use it to program your mind
and move you in the direction of whatever it is you desire.
Believe it or not, by the end of this chapter, you are not only going to identify your life’s purpose,
but you are going to begin the process of living it each and every day.
In addition, you are going to identify and, more importantly, live your purpose in each of the key areas.
It is your vision of a better and brighter future. It is what’s going to motivate you to do what needs
to be done, when it needs to be done, rather you feel like it or not.
Without a strong enough purpose or reason to take the required actions that are always required in
order to create lasting change, our system would be almost entirely useless.
It is extremely important that you fully understand this. If not, more than likely you are going to
give up at some stage when action is required, and you won’t feel motivated to do what must be
done.
Action cures fear, and fear is the emotion that is preventing you from having exactly what you
want in life. Fear of success. Fear of failure. Fear of the unknown. Don not let fear stop you from
living the life you desire.
I’m a big believer that if you have a big enough reason, you will always figure out how. But keep
in mind it is always going to require action. This is why having a big enough reason or purpose in
each of the key areas is so important.
So, let’s get started on the process of discovering your purpose. It is important to note that while
we are going to use some of the principles of what Napoleon Hill introduced in his book, we will
be using a slightly condensed version.
The reason for this is based on a few things. As I have previously mentioned, the book was written
in 1936 and while much of what is included in the book still applies, a lot of progress has been
made in the area of personal development.
In addition, as “Think and Grow Rich” focuses mainly on acquiring money, we will need to modify
some of Napoleon’s principles to include relationships, health, and personal growth.
We will be using a three-step process in each of the key areas in order to identify the following:
relationships and different people in our lives, let’s start with the most important relationship of all,
your relationship with yourself.
I want you to take some time right now to write down as many qualities, traits, and virtues you
genuinely like about yourself. They can be written down in a single word, such as honest, kind, or
funny. Or they can be written in the form of a statement such as, “I’m a hard worker or I’m very
creative”.
Below is a list of positive qualities to consider. Obviously, there are many more, however, I believe the following list is a good start:
Take about five minutes right now and use the space below to write as much as possible.
Now take a few minutes to write down as many qualities, traits, or virtues that you would like to
improve upon if you already process them or develop if you don’t.
So now you have two lists of qualities, traits or virtues you either like about yourself or would like
to improve or acquire.
What I want you to do now is to merge these two lists into a single list. Take a few moments, select
between three to five of the most important of these from either list and write them down on the
lines below.
You should now have a single list of what I refer to as your “musts”. These are the most important
qualities, traits, or virtues that you believe you must incorporate into your life to become the best
version of you.
In addition, these qualities should transfer over to the remainder of your relationships and even to
the areas of your health, growth, and finances.
For example, when I did this exercise, I came up with the following:
The point being is that I believe if I lived my life each day as a happy, well balanced, strong,
independent man, not only will this greatly improve how I feel about myself, but will also assist
me with my other relationships, my health, my personal growth and my finances.
If you don’t totally understand what I am referring to, it is okay. As we progress, I believe it will
become clearer.
It is important that words and/or statements you have chosen as your “musts” are strong, powerful
words that really represent something meaningful to you. For this to happen, you must be very clear
as to what the definition of these words mean to you not only intellectually, but emotionally.
Allow me to provide an example by going back to my own list and providing a definition or statement of what they mean to me.
Now it’s your turn. Take some time now to write down what the words or statements on your
“must” list mean to you. Take your time and be sure to be clear with the meaning and choose words
that really hit home with you.
You now should have a single list of the most important or must-have qualities, traits or virtues and
should also have a brief statement of what those words mean to you.
You are now ready to start the process of writing down your purpose statement. Keep in mind this
will be a work in progress; it is not expected to be perfect the first time or times you write it.
Do your best but have fun with it. Don’t get caught up with spelling, punctuation, or grammar at
the moment. Also, remember this statement is for you and you alone. You do not need to share it
with anyone unless you are 100% comfortable doing so.
Now I want you to write the following:
My definite major purpose for today is to live my life to the best of my ability as a (Insert all words
or statement from your “must” list) man or woman.
As an example, below is how my opening statement would look based on the “must” list I
shared with you a moment ago.
“My definite major purpose for today is to live my life to the best of my ability as a happy, well
balanced, strong independent man.”
This brief statement is exactly what I want from the day. It is my purpose for doing what I am
doing. It is my primary objective or goal for the day.
It also completes the first step in our three steps process – Know what you want.
As you may recall step two in our process is – Know why you want it, which is every bit as important
as knowing what you want.
We now need to dig a little deeper into your four key areas, starting with your relationships. We
need to know the reasons why you want to work to improve your relationships and what you will
receive in return.
Let’s start with the individuals you have elected to direct your focus on within your system, with
the exception of yourself. For example, you may recall when I designed my system, I put down my
wife, my children and everybody else.
Take a moment now to write down the individuals you included in your system on the lines below.
Remember not to include yourself as we already addressed your relationship with yourself in the
first step.
Now take some time to think about what you want and what positive emotions those relationships
will provide for you. Come up with a minimum of three words or emotions that are critically
important to you in the area of your relationships and write them on the lines below:
For example, to me, it’s important I develop – Loving, lasting and meaningful relationships.
Picking up from where you left off earlier on your purpose statement; write the following statement:
The reasons I choose to live this lifestyle is because I know that living this way on a consistent,
daily basis will virtually guarantee I will develop and enjoy – Enter the words or emotions you
have chosen that are critically important for you in your relationships and the people you
have chosen to include in your system.
For example, my statement would now look like this.
“My major definite purpose for today is to live my life to the best of my ability as a happy, well
balanced, strong, independent man. The reason I choose to live this lifestyle is because I know that
living this way on a consistent, daily basis will virtually guarantee I will develop and enjoy lovely,
lasting, meaningful relationships with my wife, children, friends, family, creator and virtually
everyone I come into contact with.” – Take some time to complete your statment
You have now completed the first two steps of the three-step process in the key area of your
relationships.
want, and what do you hope to achieve long term in this key area?
For me, I wanted to ensure I look and feel my best to provide me with the strength, energy, and
longevity so I could enjoy life to the fullest.
Take some time now to decide what you really want and why you want it in your key area of health
and write it on the lines below.
As an example, here is what my purpose statement looked like when I added the next sentence to
the statement.
“My major definite purpose for today is to live my life to the best of my ability as a happy, well
balanced, strong, independent man. The reason I choose to live this lifestyle is because I know that
living this way on a consistent, daily basis will virtually guarantee I will develop and enjoy lovely,
lasting, meaningful relationships with my wife, children, friends, family, creator and virtually
everyone I come into contact with.”
I also know that by living this lifestyle on a consistent basis, I will develop and maintain higher
levels of health and fitness. Not only will I look and feel my best, but this will provide me with
the strength, energy, and longevity to enjoy life to the fullest.
The next key area we need to address is the area of your personal growth. What do you hope to
achieve, and why is it important to you to achieve it?
As we have done in the previous two areas, let us add another sentence to your statement to include
this key area. Below is the sentence I add to my statement as an example:
My major definite purpose for today is to live my life to the best of my ability as a happy, well
balanced, strong, independent man.
The reason I choose to live this lifestyle is because I know that living this way on a consistent, daily
basis will virtually guarantee I will develop and enjoy lovely, lasting, meaningful relationships with
my wife, children, friends, family, creator and virtually everyone I come into contact with.
I also know that by living this lifestyle on a consistent basis, I will develop and maintain higher
levels of health and fitness. Not only will I look and feel my best, but this will provide me with the
strength, energy, and longevity to enjoy life to the fullest.
In addition, I will continually grow as an individual. I will increase my level of intelligence,
ability and understanding, so I have more to give not only to myself but to my family and society
as a whole.
Take some time to add your sentence to include your key area of growth.
As you know, the final key area is devoted to your finances. By this stage, I am confident you know
what I’m going to ask you to do.
Below is an example of what my purpose statement looked like when I included the key area of my finances.
My major definite purpose for today is to live my life to the best of my ability as a happy, well
balanced, strong, independent man.
The reason I choose to live this lifestyle is because I know that living this way on a consistent, daily
basis will virtually guarantee I will develop and enjoy lovely, lasting, meaningful relationships with
my wife, children, friends, family, creator and virtually everyone I come into contact with.
I also know that by living this lifestyle on a consistent basis, I will develop and maintain higher
levels of health and fitness.
Not only will I look and feel my best, but this will provide me with the strength, energy, and
longevity to enjoy life to the fullest.
Last but not least, I know living this lifestyle will provide me with financial freedom. Not only
will this guarantee me security and comfort for the remainder of my life, but also the lives of my
family and everyone I care about.
In addition, I will continually grow as an individual. I will increase my level of intelligence, ability
and understanding, so I have more to give not only to myself but to my family and society as a whole.
Okay, now it is your turn. Take some time now to complete the first draft of your purpose statement.
You’ll notice I highlighted the words first draft. That’s because this is exactly what it is. A first
draft.
Your purpose statement will take some time to complete before you are totally satisfied with the
final draft, but that’s okay.
You have now completed the first two steps of our three-step process in all the key areas of your
life.
